Joys

Thoughts for a Thursday

/ Sheila / 4 Comments

So I told you about my new favorite site, Pinterest? It is wonderful! One of my favorite things about the site is that everything you see is shown as an image, so you can literally see at a glance if the posted item is of interest, raises your curiosity, starts your taste buds watering, or brings a smile to your face. The site showcases the items “pinned” to virtual bulletin boards by site members. The whole thing is free, fun, and a great way to collect ideas, quotes, inspiration, recipes…whatever you’re looking for. I highly recommend it as the most fun way to stash “next” ideas!

So for today, a few fun quotes, gathered from the bounty available through Pinterest:

A smile is the most beautiful curve on a woman’s body.
We never really grow up. We only learn how to act in public.
Lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.
Go the extra mile. It’s never crowded.
Dear Math, I am not a therapist. Solve your own problems.
Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life. {J.K. Rowling}
May the bridges I burn light the way.

Check it out for yourself! Enjoy!

Five years in the army: congratulations to my son!

/ Sheila / 6 Comments

This is a very personal post. All my posts are personal to some degree…after all, it is my blog, so I get a lot of say in what is said. But this is not about me. It is about my son, Alex. Alex, who, marching to his own drummer, declined our offers and our pleadings to go to college after high school, and determined for himself that he wanted to join the army, is getting out of the army today. September 30 is his last day. He has served five years and a few weeks. He spent 13 months in Iraq with an infantry unit. He has done his share, he served his time, has his honorable discharge.

I am proud of him. I’m relieved that he will be in civilian life again, but anxious that he is coming out at a difficult time for the US economy in general, and veterans in particular, if news reports are to be believed. But most of all I am happy that he survived his enlistment and is ready to make a new life for himself, to create a new plan.

I don’t know what his next choices will be. I’m still hoping he’ll decide to invest in education, but that will be up to him at this point. Whatever he chooses, I know that he will have a different point of view than many people his age. He’s seen some difficult things, seen friends die, lived in extreme circumstances. So have a lot of other people. There are many men and women who deserve our thanks and our support for voluntarily serving in the armed forces. And I do appreciate all of them. But today, I’m focused on just one.

Welcome back to civilian life, Alex. Thanks for doing your part for the rest of us.

Has this ever happened to you?

/ Sheila / 7 Comments

Yesterday I got my teeth cleaned. Nothing exciting about it, just a routine dental appointment. My first plan for the time during the cleaning was to take a nap. That may not be an activity you would consider during your dental cleanings, but the hygienist at this office is so gentle I have almost been able to doze off in her chair.

I closed my eyes as she was doing her thing, and just as I was getting comfy, I thought about a funny thing I read recently, and it started. I felt the urge to smile, then giggle, and then I suddenly had a case of the giggles. You know, like when you were a kid and for no particular reason got the giggles at bedtime, or sitting in church, or pretty much anywhere that laughter was inappropriate, and impossible to suppress. The more you tried, the more you couldn’t stop.

I was almost at this point yesterday, almost at the point of embarrassing myself. It didn’t quite reach the annoying stage with the hygienist, but I think I was on the verge. I tried to think of sad things, boring things, anything that would wipe the smile right off of my face. Do you know how hard it is to have hands in your mouth when you have to giggle?

And the trigger? I was giggling about…giggling.

“I laughed so hard the tears ran down my leg!”

Saw that recently…I’ll be honest, I have laughed this hard. I only wish it was tears that ran down my leg! Let me tell you, when you suddenly develop a dark streak down the leg of your jeans, it’s hard to explain away! But if it ever happens again, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. That’s right, those are tears!

Thank goodness it was only giggles in the dentist’s office…don’t know if I could have survived the embarrassment if I had tears running down my leg yesterday. The giggling was bad enough. But I made it through without creating an incident that would haunt me for the rest of my life. No need for a change of clothes! And I got a star on my chart for great brushing! How’s that for a successful trip to the dentist?

Things to celebrate this week

/ Sheila / 2 Comments

Friday…let the weekend begin!

This week we have had more than 8.5 inches of rain. And that’s just through Wednesday! Now that’s a rainforest!

So, I spend a LOT of time indoors. Here are some highlights for the week:

~ I spent some time looking for online work opportunities. Let me tell you…if you have a project, or want to find work, there is work out there! That’s the good news. The bad news is: you have to bid for it, look for it, sign up for it…in other words, do your homework! But if you’re interested, check out these sites: Elance and Freelancer.

~ I won an award! Another blogger gave me a “Versatile Blogger Award!” Thank you Jeff. Find Jeff here. In turn, I’ll need to recognize some other blogs and share the award myself…kind of a “pay it forward” thing. I’m sorry to say I had this opportunity once before and I dropped the ball. But not again! (Find my friend MJ, who graciously passed this to me in June here.) Look for a list of blogs I recommend shortly!

~ The 2011 Alaska state Permanent Fund Distribution payout was announced on Tuesday. Every man, woman, and child who has lived in Alaska more than a year and meets residency requirements will receive $1,174 in October, Alaska’s way of saying thanks to all the hearty souls who live here! See Wikipedia. The amount varies from year to year. Though it seems like a lot of money, if you fly out once or twice in a year, you’ll deplete this amount and then some. It is a benefit across the state though. You see all sorts of ads for PFD sales this time of year.

~ Check out Pinterest. This is a site that allow you to pin things you find on line, creating virtual bulletin boards. I’m only getting started, so I don’t even know the full potential of it yet, but it looks like a great way to collect ideas, color swatches, you name it, and save for a project or reference.

~ Good stuff! Caramelized onions! This looks so yummy! Whether you make this to give as a gift, or put a jar in the fridge for an easy addition to your own meal prep, this is a great idea. Simple, inexpensive, and best of all, make ahead and enjoy on pizza or add to roasting meat and veggies, or a grilled sandwich. Can’t wait to give this a try. Love the crock pot!

Enjoy the weekend!

Birthday wishes

/ Sheila / 10 Comments

Today was my birthday, and I had a plethora of good wishes on my Facebook page, in my mail, via text, and even a few old fashioned phone calls to mark the occasion. I’m happy to say I did NOT jump out of an airplane (that was Rob’s birthday event this year, which I participated in because I couldn’t ask him to take a leap that I wouldn’t do myself). It was exciting to do the dive, but I think once in a lifetime will be enough of that activity for me, thanks very much.

Most of my wishes revolve around luxuries that I get to enjoy on a limited basis: massage, or shopping for a special item, or sometimes a vacation to a beach that has my name on it. But when someone asks me what I want for my birthday, I usually draw a blank. At that moment, I can’t think of a thing.

Well, this is a post-it note to myself for next year. This is what I really want.

~ I want to begin writing professionally. Not sure I’m good enough for that, but I want to look for ways to grow and stretch; I want to use the tools I have and the tools I can acquire to change the way I earn my living, and ultimately, the way I live.

~ I want to do a coast-to-coast road trip and play games along the way…eat in funky little places, stay in romantic old inns, visit the out-of-the-way parks and sites, and avoid the major attractions. I want just enough structure to give a general direction, and enough serendipity about the trip to be surprised by detours and finds along the way.

~ I want to learn another language. I took years of French and never really used it, and of course long ago lost what I knew. If you don’t use it you lose it…maybe this time I’ll try Italian? (This is about challenge and fun, I don’t expect to be posting in Italian a year from now!)

~ I’ve had quite a year in the past twelve months. I want to build on the things I’ve learned, the changes I’ve already made, to add more adventure, curiosity, margin, and creativity to my life.

I have a lot of wishes for other people, ones that I’ll be working on fulfilling. I’m better at knowing what I want to do for others than what I need for myself. So today I thought about it, and this is my very own to-do list for the coming year.

Here’s to birthdays, to days that make us think, and to the good stuff life has to offer. My birthday challenge to myself, and to anyone who cares to take me up on it for their own list: next year on this day, I’ll review this and see what I’ve been able to accomplish. I have a whole year…think there’s time for a little ice cream to celebrate! But I’ll have to get started soon. It may take a while to get an Italian accent down with my southern/mid-west/Colorado/Alaskan background.

Need to nurture

/ Sheila / 4 Comments

I have a need to nurture. I’ve known that for a long time, but I’m sometimes embarrassed to admit it. Does this mean I’m not done mothering? Or am I somehow seeking to make myself necessary to others by providing comfort? I like to bake, and I frequently take food to work to share. Does this mean that I’m needy, looking for approval? It can be confusing. Am I giving comfort, or seeking it?

Well, like many answers in life, I’m guessing the truth is somewhere in the middle. I am giving comfort with food, or by doing a favor, or by…(fill in the blank here). And of course I enjoy the approval that comes my way when my food is appreciated, or I know I’ve made a difference in someone’s day by helping out.

But I also think the answer is more complex than either of these obvious choices. The truth is, I am comforted and nurtured when I give to others. That doesn’t make me a saint or anything special. In fact, it could be argued that because this behavior feeds me emotionally, my giving is more about me than others. But it’s really a nice balance between the two. Everyone has strengths, and I believe that strength is a reflection of behavior or attitude that flows naturally. My strength reflects my core.

I know people who are wonderful leaders, decision-makers, clear-thinking and strong enough to create their vision for work, mission, family. I know others who are detail oriented, dedicated to seeing the smallest task through to completion. I know people who dream big and see the goal to be met. Each personality has strength, and mine happens to be sharing comfort, nurturing when I can, in small ways or large.

It took me a long time to accept that about myself, to recognize bringing comfort to others as a strength. It seemed like I was just being nice, when all along, I was being strong. Good to know!

Fall is in the air

/ Sheila / 9 Comments

What’s magic about this season? Many people say this is their favorite time of year, and that’s true for me too. I always think the calendar should begin with September. It seems like the true start to the year, forever tied in my mind to the beginning of a new school cycle. From my own years as a student, through the years of my children’s education, that rhythm was permanently ingrained. Even without a tie to the school calendar now, so many rituals focus on back-to-school events that I can’t escape the reality that summer has ended, a new season has begun. And although summer traditionally brings luxurious down time and a more relaxed pace of life, it feels good to get back to a schedule, a routine, a defined expectation of the week after summer vacations end.

Aside from the back-to-school sales, the beginning of football season, and early advertisements for Halloween (already there are masses of bags filled with bite-sized candy bars beckoning in the grocery aisles), temperatures announce that change is in the air. The sun in September has a different quality in its warmth, a different brightness in its light. By October, mornings and evenings are crisp, and by November, some days there is frost on the steps outside my front door. The familiar ritual, pulling out sweaters and boots, gloves and coats, moving the summer wear out and the winter wear in, signals that turtleneck season, stretching from September to May in Alaska, has arrived.

When my kids were little, we made annual visits to apple orchards to buy apples and cider, and to pumpkin patch farms to pick pumpkins. It was fun to have exposure to the harvest season as we weren’t connected with these experiences in other ways. It was good to see my kids learn a little about harvest time and enjoy a taste of fruit bought from the source rather than a grocery store. There is just something completely heartwarming about drinking fresh pressed cider and riding on a tractor trailer pulling excited pre-schoolers around a farm.

I like pumpkins; they’re my favorite choice for fall decorating. I add a few brightly colored leaves and nuts, some seasonal berries and cinnamon scented candles, and decorating is done from September to November. I think you get more bang for the buck from fall decorating than in any other season. And the best part: so much of what you use is available in a natural form, right from the grocery store or farmer’s market. The produce section alone offers enough variety to dress up your look for any party you host from Labor Day to Thanksgiving.

The best part of fall has to be the food: iconic comfort food like soups, chili, stews; and sweets made with apples, nuts, raisins, pumpkin and all the familiar spices. Even the beverages are unique to the time of year…apple cider and spiced teas and coffees seem just right in October and November. I never think of drinking a cinnamon flavored coffee in July…why is that? But this time of year I’m focused on warm luxury in my beverages, and topping off a spiced coffee with a little sweetened whipped cream is a perfect start to the day or end to the evening. Sampling a pumkin cobbler or apple cranberry pie is a frequent pleasure. I bake more this time of year, and I appreciate the comfort of homey aromas coming from the kitchen when I open the door after work and remember that I put a stew in the crockpot before I left for the day.

Anticipation is key; I know what happens next, and I love it. We’re all getting ready to spend more time indoors, gear up for the Christmas season, celebrate once again the Thanksgiving holiday that reminds us of the importance of family, friends, good times, good food, and the traditions that bind it all together. So here’s to Fall, the magical (and real) start to a new year, a new cycle, and the best of comfort, home, and harvest.

If two are alike, one is unnecessary

/ Sheila / Leave a comment

I’m drawn to the same things over and over again in my choice of style…in dress, in home decor, in color scheme. Clear glass vases, decanters, serving pieces call to me. Always have, always will. I love the crispness of khaki and white and cranberry. You could follow a paint trail from Michigan to Colorado to Alaska and find similar color swatches in all my homes. I’ve been known to buy a second pair of shoes that I love, to have as back up, and…just because I love the first pair so much.

But you know, when I do that, I end up saving my spare pair because it’s my spare. If I use them, I won’t have them. Ok, at the risk of exposing my craziness, I’ll bet I’m not the only woman who does this. I’ll bet a lot of women paint the same colors as they move from house to house, or find themselves buying another piece of (fill in the blank here) because they just couldn’t resist.

But as I sort my stuff, prepare for a move, I have to be honest here. I don’t need duplicates of wine decanters or cake stands.

So what’s the point of this, other than a little self-examination and personal pledge to buy less, (or at least buy different!)?

I had a conversation recently about what’s better for relationships: having a lot in common, or bringing very different personalities together? You know, the idea that opposites attract versus the reality that common interests draw people together. I heard, “If two are alike, one is unnecessary.” I thought of my multiples of possessions. Then I thought about the couples I know. True, some seem to have a lot in common. But most seem very different, in personalitiy, in interests, in likes and dislikes.

A successful partnership draws on the strengths of everyone involved. The goals of the partnership are shared, but the talents had better be unique to each person on the team. You don’t need multiple people who have the same skills (stay with me here, this is a small partnership, I’m not talking about corporate giants). You need diversity, flexiblity, and the insights that each person can share with others, based on a unique point of view, a unique skill set, unique tastes.

So it is with personal relationships, I believe. Yes, you must have interests that draw you, and common goals if you are in a marriage, a family, a friendship. None of these relationships work without cooperation or shared desires and values. But I go back to the thought that two things (or people) who are alike make one of them unnecessary. I like the point this drives home. It reminds me to celebrate the individual gifts and talents in my own relationship, to acknowledge that my husband is good at things I am not. And my strong points stand out because they are different from his.

So next time I’m tempted to buy yet another vase, or decanter, next time I’m in the paint department at the hardware store, I’m going to do it. I’ll choose something different, a new color. Because if two are alike, one is unnecessary.

Thoughts for the day

/ Sheila / 1 Comment

Rest but never quit. Even the sun has a sinking spell each evening. But it always rises the next morning. At sunrise, every soul is born again. ~ Author Unknown

Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. ~ Albert Einstein

Light tomorrow with today. ~ Elizabeth Barrett Browning

The best dreams happen when you’re awake. ~ Cherie Gilderbloom

Leap of faith

/ Sheila / 4 Comments

The house is off the market, at least for a while. Not a good time to be selling at this price range in Ketchikan, Alaska. So the listing will get a rest, at least till spring, and regroup begins.
 
I ask myself: if I can’t control the housing market, what do I control? What is my response?
 
I’ve taken inventory of commitments, obligations, opportunities. I’ve talked with managers at my office who can work with me through a transition.
 
This is my plan.
 
I’m moving to relief status with my administrative position for the medical group in January. I’m also enrolled as a substitute teacher for the local schools. I can’t continue to keep both feet in Ketchikan on a weekly basis and maintain a life with Rob. So I’m choosing. I’m choosing opportunity for the unknown over security, change instead of stability, serendipity over structure. I’m stepping off.
 
The house will still be a commitment, and one that I have to support. So I’ll do it, but in a way that doesn’t require a daily presence.
 
I’m reducing my income, streamlining my habits. If I’m working relief, and subbing in school when possible, that’s just a given. I can’t have it both ways.
 
And what do I get in exchange?
 
I get more time to be with my partner, the husband I chose long ago, and the relationship I’ve committed to. When he’s in the region to work, I’ll work, and when he’s off traveling, I’ll travel.
 
I get more opportunity to be with others who are important in my life.
 
I get potential for adventure.
 
I’ll have time to develop new interests and hone new skills.
 
I get…I don’t know…that’s part of the charm and the magic. I don’t know what I’ll get!
 
Planning for this means that thought, budgeting, organizing, daydreaming, anxiety, stress, hope, excitement, and joy are all part of the process. There are days I am excited and days I am nervous. I’ve left jobs and income before. I’ve moved. I’ve sold houses. But I’ve never left a job behind, kept the house, and planned to stay afloat on part-time work, not knowing what the future would hold.
 
It’s a brave new world, for me, anyway. I’m sure I can do it. I think it will be like the sky diving adventure in June. The first step was the hardest, and after that initial leap out the door, the rest was easy, including the perfect landing.
 
Granted, doing this is possible because I’m at a time in my life when kids are grown, there are more resources and flexibilities built in. But it isn’t easy, and it isn’t automatic. I suspect, as is the case for most things that promise great reward, it will take a lot of energy to stay ahead of financial needs, work scheduling, travel arrangements, and syncing of schedules. But isn’t that life in general? Outcome requires input. Result requires effort.
 
I’ll be shifting my efforts come January. I’ll be living life in a different way.
 
When Rob and I did the sky dive in June, we were each hooked to a professional jumper, we each had a buddy who did the work for us. We were along for the ride. This time, we’ll have to hold on to each other. We’ll be doing the work ourselves. But I think we’ll be safe. We’ve held hands before, through some pretty rough rides. This one should be good…just have to take the first step out.