Community in action

/ Sheila / 17 Comments

In the last week I saw a community in action…well, it was a small group within the little town of Craig, AK. But these people accomplished a feat. They were able to get a man, virtually homeless and penniless, to the care of physicians at Duke University Medical Center in Durham, North Carolina.

This is the story.

Rob and I came to this clinic to work for three weeks on November 28. During our first few days, there were several conversations among clinic staff about a man who was in dire need of medical attention. He has no insurance, no money, and almost no support structure in Craig. I learned he had come here some time ago to take care of his mother, who died last year. He has some social issues, to put it politely. To put it bluntly, he is dirty, agoraphobic, and has a noticeable odor.

This man became a patient when he’d recently experienced a change in his voice. 50-ish, he has been a long-term smoker. A man in town who befriended him persuaded him to come to the clinic a few weeks ago to get checked out. A large tumor was found to be pressing on his vocal chords and impacting his airway.

The front office staff began to work on getting care lined up. You do not treat cancer in Craig. You leave and travel to a large medical center to get access to the various specialists your condition requires. From this region of Alaska, that resource is most often found in Seattle, WA. But in this situation, sending this man away with no funds and no support wasn’t an option.

It was discovered that there is a brother in North Carolina, living near Duke, one of the largest medical research facilities in the country. A medical referral was made; social workers contacted. The brother there agreed to receive the brother here. Medical costs will be underwritten by Medicaid.

But…Alaska is a looong way from North Carolina. It is expensive to make a trip like that. And this man couldn’t get there on his own. Turns out the brother is in financial difficulties too, so also unable to finance such a trip. Typically Medicaid will cover travel costs, but for some reason, not in this case.

So an application was made to a national organization that provides free air travel for medical emergencies…just like this situation. For a few days there was faxing and phoning back and forth. The office coordinator spent hours of her time working out details, making calls to solidify plans, meeting with the patient to reassure him of progress.

Then three days before the patient had to travel, the flight plans fell through. The organization was willing to cover travel to Seattle or Anchorage, but not to a location so far away, and outside the standard medical destinations for needy Alaskans. The manager was very polite…he wished they could help everyone, but this was clearly outside their policy parameters.

So, back to square one, with the clock ticking.

Someone suggested the local community cancer coalition might help. The office coordinator called, and within half an hour, two ladies representing the coalition were sitting in the clinic, listening to the story. Turns out they provide up to $1500 to cover travel expenses for medical care. You make an application, make the travel arrangements, and apply for reimbursement.

Someone produced a credit card. Airline ticket, ferry ticket to Ketchikan, airport ferry ticket were all purchased. The coalition would reimburse with a check.

The ferry travel to Ketchikan was full price, but when the accountant for the ferry company came in to the clinic for an appointment, the office coordinator mentioned to her that the staff was trying to assist this patient. The ferry accountant immediately offered to get the fare discounted, which she promptly did.

A nurse from Ketchikan with family in North Carolina was already scheduled to fly back and offered to escort the patient through the travel stages. The friend who brought the patient in escorted him to Ketchikan so he had no time on the journey that he was alone or without support.

So, a small town that supports a local cancer coalition, clinic employees, a caring friend, a nurse traveling home, a brother a long way off, social workers and medical providers on the other side of the country all worked together. And they pulled it off.

I don’t know how this story will end. I don’t know if this patient has a chance of surviving. I do he would have had no chance if he had stayed in Craig. Whatever happens, he has the gift of possibility this season. And the gift came from the community, given freely, knowing there would be no payback for the time, money or energy that it took to be successful.

Even more poignant, this man is not from Craig; he is not a pillar of the community; he is barely known here. But they helped anyway. No one will get credit, or special notice, for this effort. But this man will get a chance.

This isn’t a Christmas story of a gift given because of the time of year. Timing had nothing to do with it, except that the need was urgent. But it shows me the best of small town life. Small communities don’t have large medical centers. They don’t have unlimited resources. But when you need to get something done in a hurry, you know who to call. You’re not a faceless application form in someone’s email. And that’s the second part of this story.

Small towns can show off the best of community. And I just had a front row seat.

And the award goes to…

/ Sheila / 8 Comments

20111002-183918.jpg I recently received a “Versatile Blogger Award,” (well, if you count September 20 as recent) and though I thanked my fellow blogger, Jeff, for this honor at that time, I’m only just now getting around to fulfilling the requirements that come with the award. I know, bad form on my part! But I tend to agonize a bit over this type of thing, and I put this off feeling that I haven’t had time to do this post justice. But enough delay, and on with the passing of the award!

First, thank you to Jeff who writes about his faith and posts a daily Bible study. I’m awed that he is able to be so consistent with his posts. And these are not short and sweet, but well thought out, well developed commentaries on the Bible passage of the day. He obviously makes this a priority in his life. This reminds me that I need to be vigilant about my own daily walk. Jeff nominated me for this award and I am happy to finally pass this award on to some great bloggers, listed here in no particular order. By award rules, I am supposed to choose 15 blogs to highlight.

So, here goes.

~ If you’re looking for creative, you’ll find this fun:
Marilyn Griffin posts at My First Blog of 2011 and I love the way she writes about her personal life and family and often includes a section about the special needs kids she works with, sprinkling images throughout.

~ Mandi is a crafter and teacher of English as a Second Language (ESI). She currently lives in Korea with her husband, but sounds like they will be in the US soon. She is funny and knows how to crochet. Check out Mandi’s posts at Whimsical Witch.

~ For a great photo blog…well, there are words too, but the photos are amazing…visit Meanwhile, back at the ranch. Jessie writes about returning home to a ranch in western North Dakota and the plans she and her husband have for making a home there. She is a modern day pioneer. You’ll be mesmerized by the scenery.

~ My husband actually found this blog and I always enjoy the read. Jenny is an attorney and writes from Atlanta. She is witty, sharp, a devoted wife and mom…well, I’m sure she’s many things, not least of which is a great blogger. Check out Jenny Mac at Let’s have a cocktail.

~ Kate blogs at Joyous Joys. She is an optimist and a bright spark of encouragement, celebrating joy where she finds it as she experiences life in New York.

~ For a fun pet blog, written from pet perspective, visit Rumpydog. You’ll gain some new insight to human life, and see some cute photos too.

~ I link to this site on my page. If you haven’t stopped by The Burning House you should see what people are posting as the items they would save if their house was on fire. Some choices are puzzling and some are inspiring. I don’t know exactly what I would attempt to save from fire, but I’m sure I would be challenged to fit it into one photo.

~ Amy Lee Bell blogs about homeschooling, relationships, faith, and writing at Full Circle Homeschooling. She writes from the heart. Look her up!

~ Tinkerbelle (no relation to Amy Bell, above, I’m quite sure) is a young writer from the UK who seems to pour humor from her keyboard. She’s only 25, so not sure what drew her to my blog. I found her site because she came across mine. I like her self-deprecating style and the window into a completely.different.life.

~ Stop by An attempt at humor for some laugh out loud reading. Some people got an extra funny bone or three in their makeup, and this blogger is one of those lucky writers. She was Freshly Pressed a few months ago, see this for a little relief when it comes to stepping on the scales.

~ Melody Godfred is an attorney and professional writer using her blog to generate work and to post about great writing everywhere. You might find a use for her services, here.

~ I found this site through Freshly Pressed, and have gone to it for writing ideas and guidance. This blog is maintained by a group of writers, so you get a different flavor/voice depending on who is writing on a given day. I think it’s a great resource, and of course, free!

~ Ok, you know I can’t pass up the opportunity to include a recipe blog! Tina Butler shares down home Southern goodness at Mommy’s Kitchen. A mom of three, she posts family and budget friendly recipes with an eye to tradition and comfort. Yum, yum!

~ For adventure, look no further than Lesley Carter. This amazing woman has traveled and experienced all sorts of adventures of a lifetime. You can find inspiration for a fantasy trip and check out her bucket list (I call this a life list!)

~ For a really different reading experience, visit Cider Press. There are some interesting images on this site. I have to admit, some of the writing goes right over my head. Maybe that’s a function of the fact that a lot of my time to read blogs comes at the end of my work day. But you’ll find some thought-provoking entries for sure.

Third in my list of duties for receiving this award is to share seven things about myself…I can’t recall on the spot what I may have revealed along the way as I’ve blogged the past year…so of any of this is a repeat…well, I’ve been known to repeat myself on occasion!

~ In random order…

1. I’m hopelessly sentimental about children, holidays, pets and memories.

2. I’m learning to be unsentimental about stuff.

3. I spent part of my childhood in India, Sri Lanka, and Pakistan, where my parents were engaged in mission work.

4. I spent two years living in the Arctic of Alaska. Great people, very harsh climate!

5. I used to hand smock for my children, probably the most creative thing I’ve ever done. I am not really artistic by nature…my brother got those genes.

6. I love to cook but don’t really follow recipes except when I bake. Baking requires measuring, in my experience!

7. I’m an accidental adventurer, living in Alaska because I was in quest of an empty nest adventure. But I’m finding ways to make it work for me!

So there you go! Happy reading and exploring, and I’ll be back soon with more great blog picks. I have two more award posts I’m due to write!

Craig, Aaska, take two

/ Sheila / 4 Comments

It’s Monday and we’re back in Craig, Alaska. Rob will be working here the next three weeks, and I’m here to do some training for PeaceHealth. I’m winding down, about to enter my last full month of full time. Scary, daunting, exciting, a little surreal. Here we go!

This time we’re staying in a different place. When you do locums work (filling in for a permanent provider), a place to stay is part of the package. The accommodations can vary greatly. We’ve stayed in bed and breakfasts, efficiency apartments, cottages, hotels…The nice thing is that usually the place comes with basic kitchen stuff so you can have coffee and do as much cooking as you choose without going out for every meal. (I like to go out, but on rainy dreary nights, I just want home, and the comfort of getting cozy.) The place we stayed last week for Thanksgiving even came with a Butterball turkey in the freezer, the clinic’s holiday gift to each staff member. However, I did not choose to make the turkey for the two of us. We shared the holiday meal with several others and I brought my southern-style creamed corn and sweet potato casserole. The turkey (still frozen) flew home with us on Saturday and is now living in my freezer in Ketchikan. Hey, I’ll make a turkey dinner sooner or later…just won’t be this month, or in December.

We’re only a half hour flight from Ketchikan, on the island of Prince of Wales. We came over Sunday afternoon and I was surprised to see there is a lot of snow here. There’s a much bigger road system here than in Ketchikan, though not all of the roads are paved. This island was a major logging site years ago and a lot of the roads are from that era.

These little outposts are interesting. You never know what you’ll find in the way of stores and amenities. It can be hit and miss. I’m actually amazed at what is here when I realize that everything is either flown in or barged in. When you can’t drive in, the price of everthing goes up. Way up.

I enjoy the glimpse of small town life. Well, Ketchikan is small, but this is really little. I grew up in a small town, so this feels familiar. What’s different is the degree of isolation you experience on remote islands. Ketchikan has Alaska Airlines flying in and out several times each day, and the major state ferries stop there. You can’t drive out, but you can get out pretty easily. Not cheaply, but easily enough. The ferry from Prince of Wales (POW, locals call it) takes three hours to get to Ketchikan and the connection point for other travel. Or you can fly, but that’s pricey and baggage allowance is limited. Most folks here do an occasional ferry trip to Ketchikan to make a Walmart run or for some specialty need in healthcare. Women go over a couple of weeks before giving birth to deliver in the hospital there. There is no hospital here, just a couple of clinics on the island doing primary care and visiting clinic care.

Tuesday…Today the clinic has a visiting specialty provider coming over, and someone is coming for the day to set up the scanner and computer for the training I’m doing. Weather yesterday pushed both these visits to Tuesday. No planes were flying on Monday. But people around here are used to weather ruling. Ir makes a lot of decisions easy…bad weather, no flying. Really bad weather, no boating, although the ferries are big enough they usually keep to their regular schedules.

Ah, life on the frontier! Some things are so “normal,” you’d think you were on Main Street USA. There’s cable tv and Starbucks coffee in the grocery store and everyone has cell phones. But just when you think you know what to expect you’re caught by surprise…some pieces of life just work a little differently.

I’ve learned to accommodate. I bring my heels for work in a backpack and wear my snow boots. I bring snacks and a few basics. In some of these small communities the grocery closes at 6:00 and restaurants may or may not be open. Some businesses are only open seasonally. I’ve learned the hard way to be self-reliant, at least for the first night in a new place.

I often wonder if life will look different here years from now. Change comes slowly, but it does come. Who knows? But the weather, the remoteness, the ocean…nothing will change that. And for the people who choose this as home, maybe that’s a good thing.

Choices

/ Sheila / 15 Comments

This week I made a choice I did not expect to make. I chose to not travel to my grandmother’s funeral. She passed away late Tuesday night, and over the past few days, knowing she was in the hospital, I had mentally been preparing to fly back to Mississippi. But at the moment of decision, I suddenly knew it was the wrong choice.

Rob and I have had a difficult year. We have recognized that many decisions we made in the past few years have not been healthy for us, for our relationship, and that to correct that, we needed to make radical changes. To be honest, with all the amazing adventure that Alaska has offered…experiencing the Arctic, seeing dog sled teams race, traveling to remote and beautiful locations by float plane and ferry, seeing glaciers and northern lights…if I had it to do again, I wouldn’t move here. The distance from family is too great, and adventure doesn’t replace the ability to be present.

Still, this is where I find myself today. I looked at flying out today, knowing that Rob would spend the holiday and the next week alone, and I couldn’t do it. He’s a big boy, he’s spent a fair amount of time alone in the past three years due to work and travel demands. I know he could do it. But the point is, that choice has been a bad one. We are both weary of spending time apart for the sake of work.

I considered the reality that this was a family emergency, a moment to mark and honor a beloved woman in my life, and to renew my connections with family members that I don’t see often. But in the end, I think I am honoring my family. I’m acknowledging that this relationship, even at a moment like this, has to come first. It feels a bit selfish, and I have some anxiety that this choice will not be be understood. But after a time of reflection, I am at peace.

So today I’m sharing a Thanksgiving meal with a few others from the clinic where Rob is covering call. I will miss being with my family who have gathered to say goodbye to my grandmother tomorrow afternoon. I will miss seeing the little ones who’ve grown and the ones who have joined the clan since I was last with them. I’ll miss sharing the tears and the memories, the hugs and the smiles. It hurts my heart to choose absence.

But this morning, drinking my coffee and looking at this man who has been my life for the past 30 years, I knew I was right to stay. The lesson of the moment is that we have the present, and that’s all. We may not have the good fortune to live to 90 with all our faculties intact. The choices that we’ve made, we live with, and we look for ways to re-align our priorities with family and future needs.

And my grandmother? If I could ask her, I believe she would support my decision. She was a lighthouse, staying put, watching her children roam the globe, but I don’t recall ever hearing her complain about their choices. She was accepting that life has to be lived.

Rob and I had already planned a trip back in March. I regret that she won’t be there to sit with, to share with. But we’ll visit the cemetery then with my mom, and remember her, my grandfather, my dad, my uncle and aunt…all the family we’ve lost. It will be sad, but it will be sweet, full of happy tears that these people…human, imperfect, funny, wonderful, loving…touched our lives.

And until then, I’m where I belong.

Theola Jane Kite Burton, 1921 ~ 2011

/ Sheila / 14 Comments

My grandmother died tonight. She was my last remaining grandparent, and at 90, was still going strong until just a few days ago. She was a product of a time that lives in grainy black and white photos, history books, and memory. She was a child of the depression, married at 14, raised five children with few resources, loved my grandfather, Grady Clyde.

She was “Mama” to her grandchildren, and spent countless days of her life gardening for the family, or sewing, or cooking. She was a gardener of vegetables from necessity, for most of her life, making ends meet with lady peas, butter beans, tomatoes, and whatever else she decided to plant. Her thumb was green. She grew flowers out of love, and knew how to graft, root, transplant, and do amazing things with bulbs. She collected daylilies, and roses. She loved browsing the latest catalogs of flowers. A visit to her house was never complete in the growing season without a tour of her plants, mostly moved outdoors to grow in the hot Mississippi summer.

She was a woman of faith. She believed, and she believed strongly. She was a pretty good preacher too, when the occasion and the grandchild required. Mama was no story book grandmother. Although she loved us all, she could scold when she saw the need. She was always ready to make some point, and I remember that she encouraged us as children to memorize the fruits of the Spirit and the Beatitudes.

She was a seamstress and a quilter, and her winter project was often a new quilt or two for someone in the family. Now her quilts will have a special meaning, because there will be no more from her. But the ones she left behind will be treasured.

She was a cook of country foods, southern foods, traditional foods. She made biscuits and cornbread, perfect every time, knew how to cook anything in a pressure cooker, was legendary for her fried peach pies. She made a creamed chicken dish that was pure comfort food, and knew how to make lady peas that were perfectly seasoned, perfectly cooked, served up with steam rising from the bowl.

She laughed at herself or whatever was funny till she couldn’t talk, a trait that I think I’ve inherited. She loved a joke, although she couldn’t really tell one. She wasn’t a successful tv watcher, except for the news. She couldn’t stay awake through most programs. I think she was too accustomed to getting up early to watch tv in the evenings.

She lived in same small town for most of her life. She knew pretty much everyone, and could tell you the history of families, events, all sorts of things from past doings in Winona, Mississippi.

She was salt and light in my life: salt as a good seasoning, light as a lamppost to guide the way.

As an adult, I’ve recognized that many things that are part of my life she would have no understanding of. She didn’t work outside her home. She didn’t move about, although she did travel a bit visiting her children in different parts of the world. But in many ways, her world was centered in her community, her family, her faith. I like to think that although our lives are very different externally, there is some of her goodness in me; that her influence and her faith are in my heart.

She believed she was going to a better place at the end of her life. She believed she would see my grandfather again. She believed.

And so do I. Thank you, Mama, for sharing your life with me, and with so many. Thank you for the conversations through the years. Thank you for your love. Thank you.

The Fun Theory

/ Sheila / 8 Comments

I saw this video today and it made me think…wouldn’t it be nice if everything we should do was disguised as something fun? Of course that’s the point of the video. Enjoy!

The Fun Theory

Things I’ve learned

/ Sheila / 7 Comments

In the past few months, I’ve learned (or re-learned):

~ I’m not too old to be a risk-taker!

~ I have no interest in creating cake pops.

~ I’m a writer!

~ I like chalk board paint on lots of surfaces.

~ I am not into re-purposing T shirts for other garments or crafts.

~ I have a limited tolerance for drama.

~ I’m really good at recognizing a great idea and copying it.

~ I don’t have a big ego, I like to share credit.

~ I’m a mentor in the right settings.

~ Green onions really do grow when you put them root down in a glass of water. Who knew?!

~ I’m always on the hunt for the perfect brownie and the perfect bread recipe.

~ Never write the end of the story in your head before the real story ends…you never know how things will turn out, and frequently the real story will be very different from the version you thought was unfolding.

~ True grace is unfailing and doesn’t ask to be repaid.

~ You can’t have too much shrimp in your freezer!

~ Books that spoke to you once will speak to you again. Reread and see what new things you learn.

~ When you know you have freely chosen, you don’t resent or regret the work it takes to make your choice work out.

~ Doing the right thing reinforces every other right choice you make.

~ Love means saying you’re sorry whenever you need to say the words.

~ I am stronger than I see myself.

~ Winston said it best: Never give up!

My new favorite recipe – Salted Caramel Pecan Butter Bars

/ Sheila / 6 Comments

Tonight I tried a new dessert/cookie recipe, which I’ll share below. But first, let me tell you it incorporates a lot of good things. It combines butter, caramel, and (my own personal addition to the mix) chopped pecans. The dessert/cookie…haven’t decided which category it will ultimately fit in my opinion…is baked, so it has an ooey-gooey warm comfort feeling. It has a sprinkling of French sea salt over the caramel layer, so it has a hint of sophistication. You can cut this into squares, or if you want to serve as a more formal dessert, cut into wedges and add a scoop of ice cream or whipped cream on top…decadent, decadent!

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A few other notes: I made a half recipe, as the full version calls for a pound (a pound!) of butter, and it is my policy never to make such a large amount of a dish I haven’t tasted. Just in case, you know, that the combination of all the luscious ingredients listed is not greater than the sum of the parts. After all, it would be, at the very least, a small tragedy if I had a pound of butter baked into a dessert I really didn’t care for. So that was my choice for a first attempt with this recipe. Having made it, and now, tasted it, I can safely say that I wouldn’t hesitate to commit to the whole thing. Provided I had a good way to dispose of all but one or two pieces. Otherwise, I would be needing to invest in a new size of clothes very soon. These are that good. But I wouldn’t care, most likely, because, these are that good.

So, onto the details. First, credit to the site where I found this. Check this out for a great read. So funny! And thanks for the recipe, which I discovered on Pinterest.

Salted Caramel Pecan Butter Bars

For the Crust:
1 lb. salted butter room temp
1 cup sugar
1½ cups powdered sugar
2 Tbs vanilla
4 cups all purpose flour

For the Filling:
1 bag (14 oz.) caramel candies (about 50 individual caramels), unwrapped
⅓ cup milk or cream
½ teaspoon vanilla
1 T. coarse sea salt (optional)
1 cup chopped pecans (my addition, optional if you don’t care for nuts)

To make the crust:

In a large bowl, combine butter and sugars. Using mixer on medium speed, beat together until creamy. Add the vanilla and beat until combined. Sift the flour into the butter mixture and beat on low speed until a smooth soft dough forms.

Spray a 9×13 inch baking pan lightly with non-stick cooking spray. Press one-third of the dough evenly into the pan to form a bottom crust. (I found I used about half the dough for the crust and the remaining amount was enough for the crumbled topping.)

Preheat to 325F.

Bake until firm and the edges are a pale golden brown approx 20 minutes. Transfer to a wire rack and let cool about 15 minutes.

While the bottom crust is baking and the remaining dough is chilling, make the caramel filling. Place the unwrapped caramels in a microwave-safe bowl. Add the cream. Microwave on high for 1 minute. Remove from the microwave and stir until smooth. If caramels are not completely melted, microwave on high for 30-second intervals, stirring after each interval, until smooth. (I did this step in a small sauce pan on the stove top. Just put the caramels and cream on a low simmer and stir now and then until all melted and gooey.)

Pour the caramel filling over the crust. If you choose to salt the caramel, sprinkle it over the caramel layer now.

Remove the remaining chilled dough from the refrigerator and crumble it evenly over the caramel.

My addition: Top with a cup of chopped pecans.

Return the pan to the oven and bake until the filling is bubbly and the crumbled shortbread topping is firm and lightly golden, about 25 – 30 minutes.

Let cool before cutting into squares.

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Other ideas: I’m thinking of sprinkling mini semi-sweet chocolate chips over the top the next time I bake this. Don’t overbake! The cookies cut beautifully after they cooled. Last, if you’re looking for a great shortbread recipe, this one is as good as any I’ve tried. I have never made shortbread with two kinds of sugar, but the dough was easy to work with and baked beautifully. It could stand alone as a wonderful shortbread if you want something a little less sweet, or a bit more simple.

Enjoy!

It’s almost Thanksgiving

/ Sheila / 7 Comments

Thanksgiving…can’t believe it will be here next week. This is an off year for us. Rob will be working out of town, covering call, so we’ll be a bit casual about our holiday celebration. Some years we’ve been able to connect with family, but this won’t be one of those times.

This year we’ll be on a small island in Alaska, where Rob works episodically. I’m working in Ketchikan through Wednesday afternoon, so I’ll take some of the fixings for our Thanksgiving over with me when I join him, but most likely, we’ll share the big meal of the day with a few others from the clinic who’ve stayed in town. And that’s the main thing. Thanksgiving is not a meal to eat with one or two people, if you can help it. It needs a large group, a full table, a mix of favorite foods, old and new, traditional and experimental, all blended together.

The image of the feast, the expectation of a crowd, whether it be family, or friends, or a mix of both, is so ingrained that I literally can’t imagine a different scenario that would occur by choice. To celebrate Thanksgiving at all is to acknowledge it as perhaps the most American holiday. The 4th of July is a celebration of a new government, a new nation being born. But Thanksgiving recognizes the survival of the people who came here to create what would become America.

Many people have a tradition of sharing around the table what each person is thankful for. This year I am thankful for a season of surprises. My year has had twists and turns. I began it thinking I would sell a house and move, change jobs, encounter other life altering decisions along the way. I am not (yet) selling my house, or moving…you can never tell what housing markets are going to do. My work is mutating, in ways I did not foresee; in ways that are challenging me to think about how I work, where I work, and why I work. Life is full, if a bit unpredictable. I find myself feeling grateful for what has worked, philosophical about what hasn’t, and curious to know what will happen next.

This year I’m thankful for family that is well, for the ties that bind, for friendships that have deepened, for a little one in my life that is growing and changing from a toddler into a little girl, complete with words and opinions. She’ll soon be two, our Riley girl, and quite a girl she is. She brings a smile to my heart. I’m grateful for all the family who send love to me, and who receive it in return. I’m grateful for the recognition that there is a passing of connection from one generation to the next. I feel it with my grandmother (90+!), my mother, my daughter, my son, my granddaughter.

I’m thankful for my husband who is by my side through the ups and downs, who still makes me laugh, still makes me tear up in a sentimental moment, knows what I am thinking most of the time. I’m grateful for a partner in life.

It is easy to take these people in my life for granted. Some of them have been present as long as I have been alive. Others have been part of my life so long I can hardly recall a time without them. Regardless, I want to acknowledge that the few people out of all the billions on the planet that touch my life, and in return, allow me to touch their lives, are the small group of family and friends that care, support, nurture, cry, rejoice, celebrate, encourage, and participate with me as I make my way. They are the ones who provide the color, the music, the faces of my memories.

It’s almost Thanksgiving. I wish you a joyful day, and a heart that is thankful.

Always 11

/ Sheila / 6 Comments

It’s almost the witching hour…11:11 on 11-11-11. Of course we already had a minute of this time today…this morning, but I was at work, so for me that didn’t count. I’m marking my significant moment as the evening one.

You have to admit it’s a great number. Like wonderful alliteration with words, 11-11-11 is memorable, for oh so many reasons. Easy to remember, primary, and perfect numeric poetry, symbolism and magic, all wrapped up in one. Any way you express it, all wrapped up in 1.

Years ago when our kids were early elementary school ages, Rob played a math quiz game with them at dinner. He’d give different combinations of numbers using addition and subtraction, and they would do the math to give the answer. And the answer was always 11. That became a family slogan (I think the phrase is from a movie too, but I’m sure we had it first!) and we’ve been surprised at how often 11 has been a significant number in our lives. Not that we’re superstitious or anything. I mean, we’re not picking lottery numbers with 11; 11 is not my password. But it turns up often enough that I notice – and wonder.

Today is also Veterans Day, and as the mother of a veteran, a veteran looking for a job, it holds greater significance to me than in the past. I appreciate all veterans, but viewing my son in that role brings the day and the reason for the day into sharp focus. I wonder, do I only value things that touch me somehow? And the answer comes, reassuringly, no, but like anything in life, a personal connection increases awareness and insight. So I see veterans with new gratitude, new appreciation for sacrifices. I see differently because I see through my son.

So, an important day on the calendar: a date that will be easily remembered for the births and marriages that occurred this day…easily remembered for whatever happened. Hope you made a great memory, celebrated, jumped for joy over something in your life.

As for me? I was given a great gift today. Something I thought was arranged for future work fell through. I was disappointed, deflated, dejected. And then I realized: this loss will push me more toward the kind of work I really want to do. The opportunity that evaporated was a safety net, a little bit of a sure thing (so I thought) for my finances as I step away from a “regular” job. But the reality is that I need the push to be out there, to make my own way. So, though it wasn’t what I expected when I got up this morning, 11-11-11 delivered. And it will be memorable for me. The best part? A husband who has my back, who took me to dinner, and toasted with me to our connection, and to 11-11-11.