Today my son is 25. Alex is twenty-five! My baby, so grown up and definitely, not a baby anymore. That’s been true for a long time. But there’s something about the number that catches me, pulls a bit.
Maybe it’s the “quarter of a century” thing, or the fact that 25 year olds are considered by car insurance companies to be a lower risk to insure…or some other vague and hard-to-pinpoint marker of this year. Regardless of the reason, this seems like more than the ordinary birthday. It feels like a milestone.
We talk two or three times a week, and he sends me funny texts…usually something to do with bacon, or a YouTube link that will make me laugh. I send him books, sometimes by favorite authors we both enjoy, sometimes by someone I want him to come to know.
He tells me how his latest kitchen experiment turned out and sometimes asks for a recipe of a childhood treat.
He brags on his workouts, and gives me updates on his gaming status. I never can follow the video game storyline, but he shares it anyway.
He is a blend of Rob and me. I see pieces of us in him, apparent in his talents and his tastes. And his faults. I’m a loving mother, but I’m not blind.
But I think I see an amazing man emerging, leaving behind the last traces of boyhood. Five years in the army, right out of high school, and a young marriage that has already weathered significant separation by deployment, have fostered maturity. He bought a house, has purchased vehicles, navigated his way in, through, and out of the military, all with little to no help from us. He informs us, he asks our advice. But he has been largely independent. Like we raised him to be.
He’s strongly opinionated, and right or wrong, he has the courage of his convictions. A Gemini, he has the characteristic twin personality, and can move with lightening speed from joking and humor to the other half of himself, the old soul that has been part of his makeup since birth. He’s a tough, motorcycle-riding, battle-hardened veteran who loves dogs and can discuss CS Lewis and mythology with ease. He has soft spots in unexpected places. He has an old-fashioned sense of honor and a kid’s appreciation of animation and game-playing. He’s a clean cut guy who doesn’t look his age, but when I listen to him, I think he’s already older than twenty-five.
Sometimes I am exasperated. He can be stubborn, and sometimes his honesty could use a wee bit of diplomacy mixed in. He’s smart, but not a conventional student, and I worry that unless he decides for himself that there’s value in more education, his options will reflect the lack of higher degrees.
But I’m also proud. This boy has grown up to find his own way, and to stand on his own. He’s loyal to his friends and commitments. He keeps the family ties that bind. He keeps his truth, and his faith. He thinks for himself, like we raised him to do.
Happy birthday, Alex! Happy 25th!
9 thoughts on “Happy 25th!”
What a great connection, mother and son.
Thank you! Most of the time we are connected, and that’s a good thing!
My son is 23, so our babies are close in age. I hope he had a wonderful day and knows how proud his mom is of him.
I hear the proud Mom coming through…and deservingly it seems…Isn’t it good when we see ourselves in our offspring…and to know we did OK…~mkg
Yes, I love seeing them growing into their own lives. Fun to see how they are developing and making choices, creating their futures. ~ Sheila
Happy Birthday to Alex. 25 already?! I love recalling the good times past that we shared together. It is always interesting to look back and see how life experiences shape individuals into adults. He is certainly an impressive young man. I guess the time you accidently locked yourself out of the house with him in his baby bed didn’t have any lasting ill effects on him!
Thank you Ann! He has many memories of the times our families spent together. You’re always “Miss Ann” to him!
Yes, I hope my careful parenting through the years didn’t scar him too badly! He seems to have survived all my funny mom mishaps, and I survived hiking with him, being a scout leader, home schooling, and his teen cooking experiments, among other Alex escapades! Funny times, good memories! ~ Sheila
Hey, maybe that’s the case! These boys who grow up too fast! Well, I’m sure our moms thought the same thing, once upon a time. But somehow it seemed like I was supposed to grow up and be an adult…a lot harder to accept it when it’s my “little” boy! I guess it’s a good thing I can’t roll back the clock or hold on too tightly! I’m guessing you and most moms feel the same way! ~ Sheila
Happy Birthday to your Alex. (You may recall that my son’s birthday was June 16.) Although your son and mine are very different, I saw some similarities in them through your post – guess it’s the “Gemini” aspect.