I missed them today

Two little kids used to be part of my life. They were constant companions, buddies, small partners in our parade of daily adventures. Life was rich for many years with family, sharing, and all the annual milestones that mark the years. Then they grew up and launched their own lives. Most days I’m good with that. I’ve adjusted to them being all grown up. I love this time of life for them, and for myself and Rob. It is mostly good. But now and then, when there’s an event that particularly brings their childhood to mind, I miss them all over again. For a few hours there’s a fresh ache, and it isn’t my 24 and 28 year-olds I miss, but the four and eight year-olds. The ones who couldn’t wait to carve the pumpkin and choose a costume, buy candy to pass out at the door, blow the eggs and dye them at Easter, decorate the tree.

There’s a little prick at my heart each season. I know the time of children has passed for me, and that is as it should be. I have new life experiences around every corner, a lot yet to enjoy and explore, and Rob and I have dreams for our lives together. But just for a while tonight, I missed them.

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9 thoughts on “I missed them today

  1. My son is 31, so I understand your feelings perfectly. As a previous commenter noted, it’s bittersweet. I’m thankful my son lives nearby and we’re in touch everyday. THAT’S a blessing!

    So glad to have found your blog through MJ!

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    • Yes, having your kids near is good. Thanks to cell phones and skype, although I don’t see my kids daily, I never feel out of touch. I’m so grateful that I can share their daily lives, and they share in ours. And how great for you that you take advantage of living near to actually be together. Doesn’t always work that way. You must have done a lot right as a parent! ~ Sheila

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  2. I’ve always wanted a time machine just so I could go back and visit very special children at specific years. Like Karen’s oldest son Jeremy I loved him at 5. He was so curious and we were boon companions, I was young enough to wander the back yard kingdom wth him. I miss my babies, just to be able to sit in our old rocker one more time and sing them to sleep. Cody at 6 was amazingly sweet and fun. Callie at age 18 months old made me laugh often!! I don’t want to go back and relive those years over just visit for a few minutes, I don’t begrudge them their lives I just miss them at those times.

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    • Yes, that’s just how I feel. I’d like a replay of a few minutes now and then. To be honest, I know there was a lot of work, a lot of juggling of responsibilities, and stress mixed in with the good times…the normal stuff of life in the kid raising years. I don’t need the loads of laundry or big school projects that I was a partner in completing. But I would love to relive some of the magic moments. Guess we have to enjoy fully when we can! Sheila

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    • Hey Carla, just catching up on replying to some comments I had missed earlier…sory to be so slow!

      I feel exactly the same way…don’t want to relive my kids’ childhoods, but it would be grat if I could just pop back there for a moment now and then. But I’m sure each generation experiences this – well, that’s what memory is for, I guess!

      You are fortunate to have a great relationship with your kids…comes through in your fb posts. I count myself blessed to be able to say the same thing.

      Thanks for sharing! ~ Sheila

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  3. With a 22 yr. old, who isn’t married – thankfully – yet, we are stuck in between. There is no child to do any of these things with and he is much too old. Vacations, holidays, movies – not things that resemble what they use to. But as you say, there are other things to be grateful for. It’s still bittersweet.

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    • Yes, bittersweet. But most days I can appreciate the positives that come with this stage of life…ability and health to do what we want, freedom and flexibility without regard for school schedules or other daily kid needs. Still, there are moments I would go back to those good old days of having my little ones with me. Thanks for sharing! ~ Sheila

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    • Yes, I’ve seen that side too, not personally, but with close family. I know there are joys and losses all mixed together in life. They typically go hand in hand! Hope you’re enjoying time with your granddaughter!

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